Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

What does it feel like wearing tights?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have a reading level above third grade

I actually pay taxes

Have you ever had sex with sisters?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

What is your favorite cuckold experience?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

How did a computer scientist such as Geoffrey Hinton manage to win a Nobel Prize in physics when computer science already has its own Nobel Prize equivalent in the Turing Awards?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

How did you become popular in school?

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

Would you respect the US with a woman as president?

I see through liars

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

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I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

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Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Who are the archers in Genesis 49:23?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

Can CCTV cameras be integrated with other sensor technologies for enhanced security solutions? If so, how?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Am I the unique Gen Z if I dislike TikTok and prefer the 2000s technology trends like retro consoles, CRTs, and CD/DVDs?

I can read

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

What do you typically do while on meth?

I can count

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Why aren't U.S. prisons more like Marine Corps boot camp, were every second of the day there are mandatory activities so that at night everyone is so tired they go to sleep until wakeup at 5:30 am? Would this make prisons safer for all?

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

Why do a bra and panties have to match?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t buy bullshit

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I have complete contempt for fakery

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for traitorism